Looks can be deceiving.... this boy is the naughtiest boy I have ever met. But he's just 9 years old. Things can change for the better but hopefully not for the worse 

The P5 gers 

The whole gang 

Cute hor?

Thunder and lightning did not deter me and my terrific class from having our little impromptu party in the garden. Heh loads of fun and laughter. Didn't have time to take more photographs of them, will do that tomorrow.

AMKPS Primary 3E 

Ta Da!

Had no mood to mark any more of their composition writing... ARGH!!!!!!!!!! How many times must I remind them not to use the past tense form of the verb after the word 'to'? For the rest of their lives I think.

So feeling restless and equally bo liao, I decided to re-vamp my blog...so TA DA! However one might notice a tiny slip up. My counter disappeared. Yes you read that right..my counter disappeared. "My precious...." WTF, can almost imagine Loserboi gloating over my loss.

Oh WTF.

There's a new blogger on the block by the name of xiaoyao. Support support!

Piang

Something is wrong with my blog... the sidebar decided to stay permanently at the bottom of the page ever since I published my last entry. Piang. Oh well if you want the links to the other blogs (and if LoserBoi wanna check my counter status), please scroll all the way down.

WTF.

Surprised myself by jogging in the gym after boxing last night. I managed to coax the uncle to let me jog on the treadmill for 20 min without paying for the entrance fee of $2.50. Not that I cheapo but just too lazy to walk up the stairs to buy the bloody ticket. Realised that the people in the gym get weirder as the night gets later.

It was 2030 when I started jogging. The men were of odd shapes and sizes. There was this guy with huge shoulders and chest...but with a puny waist. Piang. Nearly died of laugh and disgust when I saw him. There was also this bunch of guys who just love groping one another's muscle parts. This guy in a red t-shirt placed his hand strategically on another guy's chest and exclaimed, "Wah your chest can move more than mine!" The other guy proceed to repeat the same procedure on his friend. Piang.

However the girls were freaking chio and fit! (LoserBoi alert) This puny little slender pint-sized girl had all the guys drooling over her, including the one with chest obsession. There were these 2 other girls with ponytails who looked like they were ready to chiong after gym with their eye make-up and lipstick. Piang.

As of today, I have 2 days left to my practicum. (Just let me do this one more time!)

WHOOOOO HOOOOO!!!!!! :)

The rest of the staff have been really nice. They kept asking me what am I going to buy for them when I leave. Piang. Am racing towards the finishing line. Finished marking everything today except for a pile of small but absolutely disgusting composition writing. It gets to the point where I would pyschotically mutter to myself.

Am going to meet Anisia and Jasmine tomorrow night for food and shopping. I love those gers. So 38, cute, talkative, entertaining, down-to-earth, nice and kind. I think I will really try very hard to keep them as friends for life. Usually I quite nua about keeping up with friendships but I really do like them. Maybe cos' I'm getting old.

Alright check out for my forecasted HAPPY blog on friday night.

Croxxy! Wanna go clubbing? Kekekekek

WOOHHHOOO!!!!

It is my last week of Practicum!!!!

Feel damn happy.. but also sad at the same time cos' will have to say bye-bye to the teeny weeny likle kiddos of P3E. Kudos to them for being so adorable, pesky and altogether fun! Am going to take their pictures and develop for them! Have to finish marking everything before I leave on Friday *WOOOOHOOO! for good measure*

Everything = 2 composition writing assignments, 2 piles of maths worksheets, 1 pile of maths workbook, 3 piles of english worksheet and a small but disgusting pile of social studies workbooks. Mega big time siao liao... mabbe have to go back next Monday just to finish the marking. That reminds me ... have to go get some red ink pens. Out of stock liao.

My family went Malaysia over the weekend so I could enjoy "independent" living for a while. Not fun. Miss ma ma liao. I don't think I can live on self-cooked food for long. Either I die from the lack of fibre or from an overdose of salt or from the constant nagging I get from me pa. I wanted to jog just now but after cleaning the bloody floor and washing some clothes..well...let's just say that housework expends tonnes of energy. Had barely enough energy left to cook meself a pasta cum salad dinner. And guess what? My french dressing expired so had to make do with salt and vinegar. Eeks.

And those Hall 8 people who are reading this.... please kindly reply to Anson's email. Don't play big card and wait til last mintue than inform the "Main Comm" (aka Anson) hor. And hor must remember, each participant have to bring something edible (volleyball not counted okie Loserboi!). Shit lapsing into incoherent Singlish... liao. What is the English equivalent for 'liao'? *scratch head*

Will update u guys on my upcoming ITE, SAF and NE visits. OOOO... men in uniform ......

Eng people

I thought I was eng until I saw Croxxy's blog. *puke*

Run run run

Now that my Practicum is slowing down.... ...I can afford time to do the things I like. Been wonderful this week. I was able to jog, gym and swim coupled with my Kickboxing and Pilates. Am so eng that I can go watch Loserboi train his track team. Must give credit for Loserboi's effort. He looked really happy training those CB kids. (Or maybe he's just staring at the cleavage of some nubile young thing when she's doing her push ups. Whatever) The feeling of having absolutely nothing to do is damn shiok! Was just sitting at the grandstands, enjoying the breeze, watching people running around the track like hamsters and stretching my legs after gym.

Am going to sign up for tennis at YCK. Any one interested? It will be on Monday nights 730pm. Only 6 places left ah. Quick Quick call now!!!!! 1900-112-tennis! First 50 callers get a free keychain. heh. Sorry can't help it. Been bombarded by pesky, low-taste NKF ads everytime I switched on the telly. I was so irritated that I stopped my contribution of $10 every month to NKF. Now I donate the $10 every month to Community Chest. Seems like they need more help.

War and Peace

To help LoserBoi reel in from his site counter defeat, I shall generously link his blog to mine. Who cares about numbers? Friendship more important. =)

Androgynous

I don't think I look like a guy. I really don't think so. But there is a bunch of obviously short-sighted pieces of shit who thinks that I am a guy.

I met Steven and LoserBoi for dinner today and LoserBoi had to buy a pair of swimming trunks. So we trooped off to Sportslink.
After browsing through the racks, I overheard this salesman saying, "Wah that guy in that blue sleeveless top quite handsome!"
The other sales aunty said,"You siao ah. That one is a ger lah. She's somemore wearing a mini skirt."
"You sure or not?... ... Oh yah hor!"

I looked at myself in the mirror and cursed the daylights out of that guy. I was wearing a blue tank top with a short denim skirt. Half of me wanted to go over and slap him the other wanted to just walk away.

This is not the first time liao. I kenna weird stares by aunties when I entered the Ladies. Worse still some McDonald aunties and uncles greet me cheerfully by saying, "Ah Di what do you want?" My ideal answer would be along the lines of "I want to blast your head with the pa cheow eyes off!" But usually I just give my order in the cutest voice I can muster and they would just recoil in surprise/shock/guilt/paiseh-ness.

I really think I look like a girl.

Just waiting for the day when the McDonald aunty calls me Uncle. Siao liao... ...

BBM

It's astonishing how evil kids can be. You will never imagine the amount of taunting and bullying that takes place everyday in schools all over Singapore. Imagine going to school every morning with dread and fear. You can never imagine enough.

For starters, let me relate a lighthearted moment. You know the national day song, "One people, One Nation"? The P5 boys decided to give it a twist in accordance to the current casino debate. Here are the lyrics....

One table, 4 people, let's play mahjong
That's the way that we will be forever more
Every pong and every hu
Gives us money
Gives us face
One table, 4 people, let's play mahjong!

Under normal circumstances, I would have laughed out loud. But being the professional educator, I stopped this act of 'idiotiness'. Come to think of it, they were quite creative. Cute and creative but idiotic.

Some of you must be wondering WTF is BBM. Well... there's this girl...who is in the advanced stage of her puberty. So the boys found her disgusting and starting calling her BBM - Big Breasted Monster. How ironic. Couple of years down the road they will be lusting over her man. So the ringleader started this BBM shit and soon it spread like wild fire. The whole P5 class started to call her BBM.

As expected the girl was so traumatised that she cried and dared not come to school. Their teachers were working hard to curb this nonsense but to no avail. UNTIL *cue Jaws theme song* the Principal stepped in. Hopefully it stops soon. Feel like giving a slap, kick, jab and an elbow to the boys when I see them. But I controlled myself and decided to bestow upon them the curse of being scorned and ditched by every girl they like in future.

Next story... ...

There's this puny little thing in my class. Kind of cute but he gets on your nerves quite easily. However that's besides the point. The boys started this trend of naming him "ai dong gua" and they just kept repeating it like a flight of self-contented parrots. I mustered up all my power and unleashed the fury upon them.

All 5 of them cried. And that's not the end. All 5 of them went to that little thing, apologised and shook his hand! So cute! I love the P3s.

So there all in a day's work. Til next time... ...

26 Things That A Perfect Guy Would Do

1. Know how to make you smile when you are down.
2. Try to secretly smell your hair, but you always notice.
3. Stick up for you, but still respects your independence.
4. Give you the remote control during the game.
5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you.
6. Play with your hair.
7. His hands always find yours.
8. Be cute when he really wants something.
9. Offer you plenty of massages.
10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork.
11. Never run out of love.
12. Be funny, but know how to be serious.
13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be serious.
14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready.
15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually hurts.
16. Smile a lot.
17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it means a lot to you.
18. Appreciate you.
19. Help others out.
20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1.
21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you depart from each others company, even when his friends are watching.
22. Sing, even if he can't.
23. Have a creative sense of humor.
24. Stare at you.
25. Call for no reason.
26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just because he loves u that much to quit it.

Whewwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Life works in mysterious ways.

Fishbowl is happily scooting off tomorrow! Take care and remember to email us that you're still alive and kicking. I will miss you *boo hoo*. You may only return with gifts ah!

GEP emailed to say that I am not suitable for the program. Surprisingly I wasn't disappointed. Perhaps I didn't have much expectations anyway =) Guess I will be stuck teaching timetables, stopping scuffles along the corridors, marking, taking the mickey out of the kids and collecting newspaper articles for the rest of my life. Heh.

Let's deal with whatever life throws at us! Dunnoe why but I'm never bored by life. It always manages to surprise me somehow. So much so that I yearn for some normality and stability. But hey! No complains! Only the occasional sniffs and whimpers. Plus PMS.

Can't believe how the teachers behave during meetings. Totally like their students! Easier to 'xue huai" than good i guess. They were laughing, giggling, snoozing, making faces, talking back to the speaker and making jokes. Damn funny. As you might have guessed, I was part of that gang.

Received a shocker this afternoon... my UOB credit card bill was a whooping $862.30!!!! WAH LAU EH. Siao liao am going to live on bread and instant noodles this month. All thanks to my mum's Soo Kee earrings. Should have bought a necklance then can share.

Am totally washed out and it's barely 2230. Not talking (or rather typing) in coherant sentences liao.

My Practicum pace is slowing down...... fortunately and finally.

And guess what!!!! I got mostly As for my last observation!!!!! *self contented look*

Phallic 

The 10 Most Important Things 

Macritchie 

Reflections @ Bukit Chandu 

PMS

I do not know what to do when I have double PMS - Post and Pre Menstrual Stress aka bloody bad mood. It's a never ending double-headed cycle that doesn't end at all. At most I get a few days of relief. Lucky for me and those around me.

Just received a circular from NIE. I have to attend some NE talk after my Practicum. WTF. And visit some NS camp at Khatib. WTF. Total waste of time trying to brainwash us especially for me. I didn't see the fine print when I signed the bloody bond. Erm Di and Jie, if MOE pisses me off further well..... .... might just scoot off to Australia =P. Joking. Maybe.

I feel drained...constantly tired..fatigue always in me. Teaching wasn't meant to be this way. Must be Practicum. Sian.

Check this poem out! By my kids!

Tomorrow my parents will bring me to the Zoo.
And we will hear the cows go moo.
Next month my friend is coming to my house
He is going to bring along Mickey Mouse.
Next year I am going to be in Primary 4
I wonder what life has in store.

Waaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh.............. P3 only leh

Another one 

non-textbook answer

Hope

From Fishbowl:
As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same. However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.

Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he was constantly in need of a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant. It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers. At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise. Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners.... he is a joy to be around.."
His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle." His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken." Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class." By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper that he got from a grocery bag. Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the children left, she cried for at least an hour. On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets."

A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life. Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in life. Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer.... The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.

The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom. Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.

They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference." Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you! " (For those of you who don't know, Teddy Stoddard is the Dr. at Iowa Methodist in Des Moines that has the Stoddard Cancer Wing.) Warm someone's heart today. . . pass this along. I love this story so very much, I cry every time I read it. Just try to make a difference in someone's life today? tomorrow? just "do it". Random acts of kindness, I think they call it? "Believe in Angels, then return the favor"
I believe that friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly. "

Speak good singlish

Check out the intimate workings of Singlish.

How to Keep a Woman Happy

It's not difficult.
To keep a woman happy, a man only needs to be:
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organiser
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO: 4
4. give her compliments regularly
45. love shopping
46. be honest47. be very rich
48. not stress her out
49. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
50. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
51. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
52. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
53. Never to forget: * birthdays * anniversaries * arrangements she makes

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY!!! :
1. Give him lots of SEX (very.very.very important)
2. Feed him well.
3. Let him have the remote control.
4. Leave him in peace.

Land of David Beckham

Can't believe how busy I was this morning. When most of you were snugly tucked in your bed, I was getting ready for a battle. Had 3 visitors to observe my class this morning. My Practicum sup (the nice ang moh lady) and 2 MOE officers from the GEP department. Was quite nerve wreaking to suddenly have 3 adults at the back of your classroom watching your every move. Doesn't help that the children kept wanting to ask my nice ang moh sup whether she is from the 'land of David Beckham'. Cute but idiotic.

The lesson went quite smoothly but I think the adults were bored flat. Come on, how interesting can an English language lesson on connectors be for adults. (For those not in the know, connectors are words like 'and' - connectors of sentences; 'finally' - connectors of time; 'because' connectors of reason.)

However, they seem to wake up when I threw the kids into group work. Wake up not cos it was interesting but cos it was bloody noisy. Hahaha my kids will die if they dun talk. They think everyone within 5cm radius is deaf or hard of hearing. Funny thing is, they whispered when I asked them to answer my questions later on. Cute but idiotic.

Guess I do not have much chance to teach in the GEP. Will be stuck teaching timetables for the rest of my teaching life..or whatever's left of it.